Saying Good-bye
by Cartoon Cow
Summary: Just a one-shot on some of Spencer's thoughts after J.J. is forced to take the new job elsewhere. Other than that no spoilers just what he's thinking. Please Critique.


**Hey guys I'm doing another one-shot that I hope doesn't suck, I know we were all a bit sad when Spencer was like , "They can't just take you away." And he was all sad…..and stuff…. So yeah.**

**Critique Requested, I was writing this during the rock a thon (meaning ive been up for over 36 hours and still have more rockin to do.) but I'm also updating by mobile site on my android so bad mispells or wrong placement crap goes to that.**

**Please read and review = )**

**Saying **_** Good-Bye**_

I'd been staring into my coffee mug for over an hour now and still hadn't taken a sip. Instead of going home after learning of J.J.'s new job I decided to come to a local coffee shop that I knew would close a little later than some of the others that were nearby.

I didn't want to go home- not tonight. Instead of home seeming like a refuge away from the horrors of our job it was now reminding me of what I was losing.

J.J. had been the first person to give me a nickname and now she was gone. This may not seem like such a big feat to a normal person but to me I was losing one of my best friends- one of the people I trusted with my life.

There were only 7 people like that, that existed.

Derek Morgan

Penelope Garcia

David Rossi

Jason Gideon

Aaron Hotchner

Emily Prentiss

And J.J.

My mom doesn't count though, because I'm supposed to be the one looking out for her.

Look how well that turned out. I left her alone in a mental sanitarium because I _couldn't _care for her- I couldn't give her the care and protection she needed.

I think it was because of this that I didn't put up any pictures in my apartment when I moved to Quantico.

No reminders of my past, just the thought of moving forward was enough for me- the thought of making my dad pay for leaving us by showing him I could excel without him.

I was shaken from my thoughts as the shop owner waved his hand in front of my face, "Hey." He said again, "Its time to close up."

I leaned back in my seat- realizing I had been leaning over my coffee ever since I had arrived- about 2 hours earlier.

"I-im sorry." I said scrambling to grab my satchel off the table, "I didn't realize it was so late."

"That's fine." The old man said folding his rag over his hand, "Looks like you got somethin' heavy weighing on your mind."

"Yeah." I barely managed. Tears were already beginning to sting the back of my eyes and I knew it wouldn't be long before my weak levee would break and a flood of emotions would come with it.

I threw my bag over my head and slowly scooted my chair in, "Go home and get some rest kid, the bags under your eyes shouldn't be there for another 20 years. You're too young to be so stressed." He said wiping the table off.

I scoffed, he had no idea what I saw every day. But then again it's not really something a normal 28 year old would see."

He threw me a skeptical look as if to say, _"What got something to add?"_

I didn't reply to his look, but instead turned and left.

I guess home was the only place left to go. It was already going on eleven and work was going to be hard tomorrow without J.J._  
_

* * *

I shut my apartment door behind me with a soft click. My eyes trailed over my bookshelves that held a few pictures here and there of J.J and I, Morgan and Garcia laughing, Hotch holding Henry once J.J. had gotten back from maternity leave.

I remember when J.J. and Garcia had first came to my apartment to check on me after I had missed three days of work due to the winter bug. After tormenting me on my health problems and insuring I was properly taking my medication as in not skipping antibiotic's, they both cornered me and told me I needed to have pictures out of those who love me so that I won't ever forget them.

At the time I had laughed and replied I wouldn't ever forget them- besides I saw the real thing every day which was something a picture couldn't do.

Despite this the next day they both showed up with pictures. I picked out several I liked and told them to keep the rest for themselves.

Looking at the pictures now I couldn't have been more grateful to the two of them. They were teaching me how to do something I hadn't done in years… Trust.

Fatigue was now wearing heavily on my mind- I drug myself towards my bedroom and collapsed on my bed.

Despite how tired I was, and how much I knew I needed the sleep, I knew sleep would not come.

And it wouldn't, for a long time…

_Good-bye J.J….._

I sobbed...


End file.
